Welcome Home {pictures}

Today marks 3 weeks since arriving home from Ethiopia and I am finally getting around to posting a few pictures from the much anticipated home-coming.

These were while we were trying to pack to leave. Um, do you think they were just a little excited?!

Their first time on an airplane... something they had only dreamed of.

Even the airport was an exciting adventure!

There were so many friends and family there to greet us at the airport... a welcome sight after 32 hours of travel!

It brought tears of joy to my eyes to see all of those who had been faithfully praying all these months there waiting to celebrate with us.

Our first glimpse of the waiting crowd...

No words. Just real and raw emotion.

Do you think she's happy to see her daddy? :)

What a reunion...

Incredible to see God's plan come to fruition at this moment.

First picture as a family of 8!!!

The LORD has done great things for us, and we are filled with joy! 

Psalm 126:3

(A very special thanks to Steve Skibbie of Grand Design Photography for the airport pictures.)

Ethiopia Bound!!!

So I'm leaving for Ethiopia in just 2 days!!! This past week has not been without its challenges for sure. Getting ready to go to the other side of the world to bring two children home while trying to manage everything else around here is not for the faint-hearted!

Been craving a real Ethiopian macchiato. Mmm- only a few more days! 

First, we had the issue with the flights. Since we had previously paid for 7 round trip flights to Ethiopia, one would think that surely we would have a few free flights coming our way with miles right? And one would think that we would be able to choose the flights right? Well, it was a little more complicated than that. Our favorite airline that we have flown twice before was no longer a partner with United, which is who we had a lot of our miles with. So we had figured out the next ideal travel arrangement and tried to get that worked out. Well, apparently when you use miles you have very limited flight options, even if the flight that you wanted is only half-full- they won't let you book it. So because we needed to use those miles we ended  up booking 2 one-way tickets for the kids with an unfamiliar airline and then booking my flight separately on a different website. Well, that would have been the end of the story EXCEPT for one  minor detail... for the last leg of the trip- I was on a completely different flight from Nati and Mihret! So I was scheduled to arrive at 5:30pm, while they were not coming home till 9:30pm! UM NO- that's not going to work! The site that we booked my tickets on wouldn't let us get the late flight, but we figured it was no big deal to just call United and have them change the kids' flights to the 5:30 one. WRONG! Randy spent hours over many days on the phone with them and they were not willing to budge. I mean Cmon- we're talking about a MOM and her CHILDREN here! Randy was so angry and finally got them to make an exception so that we could all be on the same flight home. Phew! That's a relief.

Then we had an incident last week with our youngest son Nathan who broke out in severe hives two days in a row. It was really scary and seemed to be getting worse, so Randy  took him to urgent care and he got a shot of epinephrine. Within minutes, the hives were gone. Great. So he had an allergic reaction to something, but what in the world was it?! We got epi-pens just in case and had him stay clear of peanuts because he had a peanut butter cookie those two days that it happened, so we thought maybe that was it and he didn't have another outbreak again. We went to the allergist a few days ago and after getting poked   with dozens of different things, it was determined that Nathan is not allergic to anything! Huh? Apparently, people can just have these acute outbreak of hives and not have any reason for them. So, we were thankful that he can eat peanut butter and everything else normally and just pray that we don't see those dreadful hives ever again!


So perhaps the best, most exciting thing that has happened this past week is that my mom is coming with me to Ethiopia!!! I was planning to go by myself, and felt confident for the most part because for me, it's like going home. I love Ethiopia and the friends that we have that I know will take care of me. Of course Randy and I are both sad that he can't come, but because our primary babysitters are on vacation for 2 weeks, it just seemed impossible for us to both go and leave our kids for 8 days.

My mom called me the other day while I was out on one of my many trips to Target (I've only been 5 times this week!) and asked if I wanted a travel companion. I was like- what do you mean? So she asked if she could come along with me to Ethiopia! I was seriously shocked and couldn't believe that she wanted to come! But she said she did and she just needed to see if she could get the time off work. So finally on Wednesday of this week her supervisor reluctantly let her have the week off and she booked her tickets on Thursday! This is huge! My mom is an elementary school teacher and as you can imagine, it is really stressful trying to find someone to sub for 7 days in a row on this short of notice and then preparing lesson plans and everything else for her absence all while getting ready to go to a foreign country in only 2 more days!

Us with my grandparents, my mom Diane, her husband Brett, and my brother Brandon

Also, my relationship with my mom has been pretty strained over the years- it's no big secret and I know she would agree with that fact. Life has been hard for both of us and instead of opening up and working on our relationship over the years, we have just kind of ignored it. We are nice to each other, but we just never seemed to have that mother-daughter bond and closeness that I have seen in other families. But lately that is changing. And I am so thankful. God is working on both of our hearts- I can feel it. And what better time to bond with eachother than on a trip like this?! This is definitely out of her comfort zone and I know that there will be times when it will be hard. But I am so proud of my mom for having the courage to be vulnerable and do this with me. I know that we will both be changed and blessed by this trip and I am just so excited for her to be able to experience my favorite place in the world with me!!! Plus she gets to be the first one to meet Nati and Mihret and spend a whole week with her new grandchildren- that's pretty special! I love you Mom!!!

So we leave Monday morning and will arrive in Addis on Tuesday night. Nati and Mihret will join us Wednesday morning and then our embassy appointment is Thursday March 1st. Friday we hope to do some sightseeing at Lalibella and then Saturday is the big going away party at the orphanage. Sunday we'll be with Fekadu's family at church and his home and then Monday we'll pick up the visas and have to say goodbye. We will be back home in Fresno on Tuesday March 6th and our family will finally all be TOGETHER!!! YAY!!!

It's finally here! We have been waiting 18 months for this and I can't believe it's only a few days away! Looking back, it has been a long, hard road but we can see now how God has just been in every single detail. It is really incredible. That day that we first met them we had no idea what we were in store for and I'm pretty sure we could not have handled knowing it all up front anyway.

And although this part of the process is coming to a close, we know that the journey is really only beginning. Our family is about to change forever. We are excited, but nervous at the same time. This is the biggest thing to happen to us for sure. We are confident that God who has been faithful this whole time, will be faithful as we adjust to being a family of 8 as well.

To all who have been a part of this journey. To all who have prayed, and given, and supported in so many ways. THANK YOU. We love each and every one of you and are so grateful for you. YOU are a part of this story! Praise God!

LOTS of changes around here! :) You need to read this post!

Yeah, so it's been a few months since anything has been posted on this blog.

I'm not gonna lie. It's been a rough few months. We have had a lot of things going on in our family and it's been probably the hardest few months of our lives. Months of pain and suffering and heartache that I would not re-live for anything. Someday I hope to share some of it with you and God will use it all to bring glory back to Him, but for now it remains to be shared at another time.

SO....

On a more positive note, here's a little bit of an update on our crew. There have been lots of changes around here. Including:

• Austin (15) getting the privilege of working outdoors with a friend, who works in construction, is very patient with teen boys and is just an all around cool guy. He worked for 2 weeks as an apprentice from 8-5, just like a real job- and he loved it!
• Jensen (13) started attending jr high school at our local public school. It was quite a change from being home all day and they have SO much homework, but he is adjusting great and doing really well. He joined the track team and went to FCA last week and he is really getting in the groove of everything. 
• Nathan (11) started 5th grade at the local school 2 weeks ago and is doing pretty good as well. This is his very first public school experience, so again it is quite a change from being homeschooled for so long- but he is very social and already has made lots of friends. He is thrilled that he gets to ride his bike to and from school every day! (and so is mom!) 
•  Austin began attending a center called Brain Balance a few weeks ago. He had intensive assessments done beforehand that helped the staff to develop a custom program specifically designed for him and that will stimulate the parts of his brain that aren't making the right connections.  By integrating physical and cognitive exercises with dietary change, they are able to help correct the underlying imbalance, improve function and reduce or eliminate negative behaviors. We kind of stumbled upon it, but quickly realized that this is what we have been looking for and praying for for so long. He goes 3 days a week and also has exercises that must be done 7 days/week at home. I will let you know how it's going as we get further down the road.
• Elliana (3) has been her typical self. She talks non-stop and simply must say hi to every person in the world, whether it's at the park, Target or on the phone. She misses her 2 brothers now that they are in school, but now she gets more one-on-one time with mommy so it's not really that bad. She wants to do "preschool" with me all the time- which basically is just coloring, learning letters and playing with playdough or puzzles- nothing fancy! She is very anxious for her new brother and sister to come home and play with her. She wakes up almost every morning and asks me if sissy (Mihret) is going to come home today? I tell her no. Then she asks if it will be "in a minute?" I say no, but it will be soon. "Tomorrow?" she will ask. And I have to tell her that it will be a little while longer. And up until yesterday, I had no idea when how much longer that little while was going to be.  A few days ago, we were hoping that it might be mid to late March...

BUT....

Yesterday we got a surprise email from the embassy and....well.... there's a story behind it, but for now I just wanted to shout the news to y'all that I have been waiting for almost 18 months to shout. Perhaps the biggest change of all: 

It's FINALLY happening!!! 

OUR KIDS OUR COMING HOME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Most likely I will be traveling by myself, leaving in 2 weeks- February 27th. The visa appointment is scheduled for Thursday March 1st and Nati, Mihret, and I will be arriving HOME on Tuesday March 6th!

Did I REALLY just say that??!!! 

HOME!!!

We will all be together!!! Yeah!!! I will update more soon, but for now...

Join with me in PRAISING GOD for this amazing, wonderful news!!!!

Praise the LORD!

Praise God in his sanctuary;

praise him in his mighty heavens!

Praise him for his mighty deeds;

praise him according to his excellent greatness!

Praise him with trumpet sound;

praise him with lute and harp!

Praise him with tambourine and dance;

praise him with strings and pipe!

Praise him with sounding cymbals;

praise him with loud clashing cymbals!

 Let everything that has breath praise the LORD!

Praise the LORD!

Psalm 150

A Story of Love: Our journey to Nati and Mihret {Part 1}

Get your tissues ready.

I decided that I didn't want to wait until the kids came home to share our journey with you all. I started this video on the plane on our way to Ethiopia and it is probably the most emotional one I have ever worked on. God has done so much this past year and I wish I could share every detail, but that would take days- so this is my attempt to sum it up.

Yes, I know that our children are not home yet. But did I mention that they are OURS??!! :) AH! God is so good! All we wait on now is their visas, which will take anywhere from 6-12 weeks. We are praying that we will be back to bring them home by the end of January, but whenever God allows it to happen, we are resting in the fact that HE has done miracle after miracle and has made them a part of our family. We are in the home stretch now. This is only part 1, but as you will see- it is a huge part of our journey. Thank you to every single one of you who have been a part of this journey as well. God has used YOU to bless our family in more ways than any of us will ever know. We have told Nati and Mihret about so many of you who have prayed for them for so long. Very soon, you will get to see the evidence of God's faithfulness first hand and I pray that as you are blessed by this story, you would give all the glory to the One who made it all happen.

So sit back and relax, turn up the volume, and get ready to witness one simple testimony of God's unending love and faithfulness...

They are ours!!!! We passed court!!!!!

Thanks be to God for His indescribable gift!!!!

We are thrilled to announce to the world our newest SON and DAUGHTER:

Nati and Mihret Wagenleitner!

It's been a long long journey and there are still a few more steps to go, but we could not be more excited to share our JOY with all of you- our friends and family!

We are now officially mom and dad to two more beautiful, amazing children and we are just so so blessed!

Easter Sunday 2011- The day we asked Nati and Mihret to be our son and daughter.

The day they said YES! :)

I have so much more I want to say, but of course the internet is not cooperating  very well for me to be able to write long posts or upload lots of pictures. There will be more to come, but I just want to say THANK YOU to all who have been praying for our family. We would not be here without you and it is obvious that we needed to be here today! Praise God!

We already have to say goodbye tomorrow and honestly I can't even think about how we are going to do that, except that God will give us the strength. This has been an eye-opening trip for us, as we have had Nati and Mihret staying with us. They are so happy and sweet, but it has been a challenge to try to communicate when we don't have a translator with us. We are definitely learning a lot more amharic than we ever have and we have a renewed sense of urgency to learn a lot more when we get home too!



Love you all! Post more when I get a chance!!! 

Here we go again!

In just a few hours we will be on our way to Ethiopia for the 3rd time in 14 months! Whooo Hoooo! All frustration and sadness is behind us and we are positively EXCITED to be able to be on our way again! It has been the craziest week EVER but one that we are certain has been in God's plan the entire time.

Lord willing, in a few days if we pass court, I can take the hearts off their faces!!!

Preparing for this trip has been nothing short of amazing. Remember that a week ago we were not planning to come to Ethiopia. We really thought we were safe in assuming that we weren't going to have to come for court. We thought we'd hear confirmation on Monday morning so we'd have at least a week's notice. Tuesday came around, then Wednesday...Thursday... and by Friday morning we were stressing out just a bit. They told us we might hear on Saturday or possibly Tuesday(as in today!) if they ever talked with the judge, since he hadn't yet. Well, a decision had to be made and so Friday morning we just went for it, booked flights and made sure that they were refundable! This was the beginning of a very full weekend. I don't know anyone who has  decided to go to Africa, booked flights, and then got on a plane 4 days later- it is insane! But the amazing part is that once we said yes, God has shown us over and over that HE is in control and that HE blesses His people!

There have been so many "God moments" this past year, that I have a hard time keeping up with all He is doing. (good thing I have the blog huh?! :) I know I have said this over and over, but it is incredible to be a part of the miracles He is doing and I just have to share or I'll burst!

I woke up on Sunday morning to yet another email from the staff lady in Ethiopia. It said that since we were now traveling to Ethiopia, we needed to bring a few notarized documents as well as the $ for N and M's visas which is $404 x 2 = $808! Seriously? We had signed a contract back in March that stated this $ was to be paid to the embassy on our last trip- not the court trip- and that they would notify us of any changes. So, does one business day count as enough notice to come up with another $800 cash?! Yikes. She also told us that there would be some documents for us to sign when we got there. Soooo, tell me this: if we hadn't traveled HOW was all this going to get to Ethiopia by the end of this week??? I asked her that and her reply was that they would have let us know eventually and we could have sent it to our U.S. agency who then would have sent it to their office in Ethiopia. OK. So obviously nothing is urgent when it comes to this adoption... this next step is something that could only take 4 or 5 weeks but I think they quote families double that because they are not in any hurry! So, needless to say we feel that if we would have stayed and not hand delivered all of this to the staff, we would probably be looking at another several weeks of delay. Now I know that a few weeks may not seem like a big deal to you, but when you have waited as long as we have, this mama does not want to be a part of any more delays- whether it be days weeks or months!

So, all morning we were a little worried trying to figure out how in the world we were going to come up with even more money for those visas and I just kept praying that God would provide and give us peace about the situation. And oh my how faithful He is! That afternoon a friend who I really don't know super well called me and said that God had put our family on her and her husband's hearts and they wanted to know how they could help us. I mentioned to her about the email that had come that morning and that we were still needing to figure out how to take care of it by the next day. She immediately said that they wanted to cover it. I was like NO- that is waaaay too much $$ and you can't do that. She insisted that it was exactly what they wanted to do and asked me to let them do this. She said that adoption is something that is close to their hearts, but they are not in a place to do that right now, so they wanted to bless us instead! WOW! Talk about speechless, humbled, amazed by God! I just cried and praised God for HIS faithfulness.

This is just one story of the dozens and dozens we have of God's amazing provision each step of the way. This weekend I put a last minute shout out on facebook that we were taking some clothes for the kids at the orphanage, and within a few hours I had enough to fill 2 huge suitcases! WOW! Another friend was scheduled for family pictures this weekend along with several others and I had to cancel on them. It was hard to say no, because not only do I love to do it, but I also knew that all the $ that I make for pictures for a purpose goes directly to our adoption expenses and not only did we have this trip to pay for but now we will go again for the 4th and final trip hopefully in only a month or two. So I was shocked when I went to get the mail yesterday and found a check from this family that was incredibly generous. A.M.A.Z.I.N.G. I mean, who are we that we get to experience this blessing over and over?! It is so very humbling and incredible and I give all the GLORY and PRAISE to our LORD!!! He delights in blessing His children and we have seen that so many times. We are so thankful and grateful.

To those of you who have been praying for our family... it is because of you that we are here on this journey today. We do not forget how many obstacles and trials we have already overcome, but it is only because of the faithful prayers of the saints that God has given us the victory. YOU are N and M's family too! My heart is just going to explode with gratefulness to God and is people right now. We love you all so much.

Ok, so the next time I post we will be in Ethiopia! Hoping for better internet than last time, but it is never certain so we will just go with the flow! :) We have a very special surprise for N and M when we get there and I can't wait to tell you what it is. But sorry- you can't find out until they do! :) We will only be in country for 3 days, but we know they will be blessed, amazing days and we are just thrilled that we get to go again!!!

Love you all!!! Keep praying!

But thanks be to God! He gives us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ. 

1 Corinthians 15:57

Switching gears: Ethiopia Bound in 3 days

I want to clarify something that may have not been clear in my previous posts. That we are NOT in any way upset that we get to visit the kids. I hope that I have been able to adequately express how deeply we love N and M and how much we have missed them all these months and long to be with them again. If you have read this blog for more than a day, it should be clear! :) It's not that we are throwing a fit because we "have to" go. In fact, we are thrilled that God would allow us to see them and be with them once again before joining our family forever.

The frustration and sadness and even anger have really been more because we feel that our agency has not been honest or faithful to us during this whole ordeal. Last year I researched and found many many reviews that said that this is one of the best agencies for older-child Ethiopian adoptions and of course they were one of the only ones that would even consider working with us. So when we sign contracts and pay many thousands of dollars for services, we expect that we can trust them to do their part and to shoot straight with us. If someone makes a mistake and drops the ball or promises something that cannot actually happen, then just be honest with us and admit it, apologize and move on. For the past year we have had many communication problems with this agency and while it has been frustrating and taken many calls and emails- most of which were never answered, we have eventually found out the information that we needed. But this has been different. This is way beyond someone not returning my call or email. And right now, there is nothing we can do.

The last thing that happened was that I talked to one of the guys in Ethiopia yesterday who was supposed to go  to the judge Friday morning with all of our stuff and see what she said. Turns out that the judge wasn't there all day, so he didn't get a chance to see her. Bummer. Well, instead of just saying that we needed to go ahead and come to court, he tells me not to worry because he would talk to her tomorrow. I asked him: tomorrow? Isn't that Saturday? Does she work on weekends? He said No, but I know her and I can contact her. I'm thinking, if you know her so well, couldn't you have contacted her one of these past 5 days?! So the staff in Ethiopia is telling me that we don't need to worry about coming for court because he will just figure it out. Then I hear from Fekadu that he talked to this guy too and he told him that he was going to go meet with the judge about our case next Tuesday! Um, Tuesday is just a little too late for us! This same guy tells me that it's ok if we need to re-schedule. Yeah right buddy- do you know how long we have waited to finally get to this step??? There is no way that we are going to purposely prolong the process because it's not convenient for us to travel right now!

So, we were told (once again) that we would "hopefully" hear news today, which is Saturday. The U.S. staff from our agency recommended that we go ahead and book our flights. So after being back and forth on the phone and through email about all of this yesterday, Randy called our travel agent and asked him to work his magic, which he did! He was able to get us decent flights and a decent price (it still would have been cheaper if we had been able to book them on Monday, but oh well) and he told us that we have until 3PM on Monday to cancel for a full refund minus the travel agent fees. So we are not holding our breath, but there could be still a chance that we don't go. Although at this point we are 95% sure that we are going. Talk about a little stressful!

So, our plans for this weekend have changed just a little. I had 5 portrait sessions scheduled, we were going to get our Christmas tree and maybe do a few Christmas things like baking cookies and watching cheesy movies. Next week was a very busy week full of appointments and activities. Instead I have now canceled all appointments (so sorry again you guys!) we are waiting until we get back to get the tree, and we will be busy  getting things together so we can leave Tuesday morning. You can bet that we will be at Target no less than 3 times before then, as it seems we have always forgotten something and I think I hear a Peppermint Mocha calling my name- so I don't think it will be all that bad! :) Randy is still going to put the lights up today, we have a dinner party for his office and the kids will be going to the Christmas parade tonight with my mom, so not all plans have been canceled!

We have officially switched gears and are just thrilled to be able to bond with N and M yet again. I have got to say that there is absolutely NO WAY we could be doing this if it weren't for our awesome, amazing family and friends. Not only have you prayed, but you have stepped up and gave $, offered to help with kids or whatever and 1 sweet friend has even offered to bring dinner Monday night before we leave- you have no idea how much that means! And a huge shout out to my in-laws Tim and Darla who not only have dropped everything to be able to watch our 4 kids while we are gone, but also saved the day by generously giving towards the plane tickets. We are so thankful and blessed beyond measure.

We leave in only 3 days! SO much to do before then. I'll keep you posted of any updates if I can! :)

FB status update.

No time to post a formal update right now, but I know some of you have been watching and praying and waiting. So here's my status update from about 5 minutes ago:


Tickets booked. We leave on Tuesday 10AM. The judge wasn't there, so we must go. Thrilled to see N and M even if it's only for a day, but at a loss to know how to even process this. We were going to go get our Christmas tree after school today. Instead I have been on the phone and emailing all morning. No school has been done. Elliana peed all over her bed. Kids are fending for themselves. Help! Lord, we give all of this to you. You must have some plan and we praise you for giving us the opportunity to use us. We praise you even in this storm...


God is good even in this. I'll post more when I get a chance.

Frustrated... PLEASE PRAY!

Yeah, that's just one word that describes how I am feeling today. If you've been following some of my posts on facebook, then you already know some of the drama that has been going on. If not, well, let me fill ya in a little bit.

On Tuesday when I updated about being patient, I had no idea what the next few days would hold. This whole process has been long and hard and unlike anything we have ever been through, but this week has been an entirely different trial. We *thought* that the problem was that our agency's staff in Ethiopia was just not communicating with the staff in the U.S. We kept waiting and expecting to hear one of two things: 1) The judge approved our letter of exemption and we passed court. The kids are legally ours and we can hope to travel to bring them home in 6-8 weeks! {obviously this was our first choice} OR 2) The judge denied our letter and says that we have to show up for court on December 9th. We hope for a favorable decision on the 9th and if we pass, then the kids are legally ours and we wait 6-8 weeks from that approval. {our 2nd choice, but one we were prepared to face on Monday morning}

I called and emailed our agency repeatedly Monday and Tuesday, but got nothing. So Wednesday morning, I took it into my own hands. I had heard that one of the legal reps was in the hospital (which explains why he wasn't returning emails or phone calls), so I found the # of the other one and I got up at 5am to give her a call in Ethiopia. She said she knew exactly who I was and that she knew a little about our case. She said she was sorry, but she still hadn't heard from anyone who had actually been in court and so she was going to find out the next day and her words were "I hope to get confirmation from our staff that you do not have to travel. I will let you know tomorrow." So I got off the phone Wednesday morning frustrated again that we still had no official news, and that I can't wait for the U.S. staff to find these things out for me, but somewhat hopeful because she acted like we would for sure have an answer by early Thursday morning. One more day and we would hear that we would either be going or staying.

I hardly slept last night. Tossing and turning and worrying and praying. Checking the time every 10 minutes and figuring out what time it was in Ethiopia.

I got up at 3am, knowing that it was 1pm there and sent a quick email as a reminder that as soon as she found out to please let us know.

I went back to bed for a couple of hours and woke up abruptly. I was thinking: This is it. This is the day that God is going to answer this prayer and show us how great and wonderful and big He is. This is the day He is going to blow us away and we are going to shout to the world that 2 children are no longer orphans! I really expected to open my email and have this confirmed. I so wanted it to be true.

But instead of hearing this, I opened something completely unexpected. It was an email from the same gal in Ethiopia that I had talked to the day before and it read: I am sorry to say that the news is not promising, as we do not have any record in our office of having received your letter for the court, or the photos and passport copies that are required if you do not attend. I am so sorry about this and will be checking with Susan. As well the judge has not been taking too well to families coming on a different date or not coming at all, so I think you may have to make plans to be here next Friday.


My immediate reaction was a loud WHAT??!! What in the world was she talking about? No record of anything? Not only did we send everything the day after we heard about our court date, and were assured that it would be received in plenty of time, but we had also left it all with the legal rep (who was now in the hospital) way back when we were there in April. Not to mention that I had JUST talked to this same gal yesterday about our case! We have been told for two weeks that someone was going to take all of those documents to court and represent us. All of a sudden everything was "lost" and they had never even seen it?! Oh. my. goodness.


After many emails and phone calls back and forth today, (believe me, it wasn't pretty) we think we might have figured out what happened. It seems that because the one legal rep that we left all of our paperwork with is gone to the hospital, no one actually took his place and took over our case. Which means that no one actually showed up in court for us. Or if they did, they certainly did not present our letter, pictures, etc for the judge.
>insert MAD FACE here. !!!!


Seriously, as the day unfolded and we were being told that we should plan to be in Ethiopia next week because they "think" we should- I just wanted to scream. We don't want to hear what they think we should do, we want to hear that someone saw the judge and we want to know what she said! Why in the world is it so hard to confirm that SOMEONE was there and that they heard what the judge ruled?! Oh, maybe because no one was? After this, I told our agency point blank that we wish we could trust them but that they have shown us that we simply cannot. 


These are CHILDREN we are talking about here! God's heart beats and breaks for the least of these: the poor, the widow, the ORPHAN. Don't mess around with the LORD Almighty! It is clear that God must have an amazing plan for N and M's lives as we have been faced with attack after attack these past 14 months. Satan hates to see orphans gain families, but God WILL prevail and He WILL have the victory! HE places the lonely in families! 


We have one last glimmer of hope before we have to make our travel plans tomorrow. Someone is going to go to the court without an appointment and present our case to the judge tomorrow morning in Ethiopia. It sounds like this will be the first time she will read our letter. We are praying that by some MIRACLE, the judge says that we do not have to be there on Friday morning. That she would surprise everyone and make an exception because we have proven our love and commitment to N and M and spent a significant amount of time with them. 


If she says no, we will have to make plans to leave just four days later. Ugh. My stomach is in knots just thinking about it.


If you are reading this right now: PLEASE PRAY!!!! This is an impossible situation and our agency is positive that we are going to have to go. We would love to see God show up and prove them wrong! 


But even if the answer is no, we must cling to His promises that He has not left us or forsaken us. That He will work all things (even the hard, crazy things) together for the good of those who love Him... 

I cannot even pretend to imagine why the heck this would be a part of His plan, but maybe someday we will look back and see. Or maybe not. We will just know that He meant it to happen for His purpose and for His glory.


Join us tonight in coming before the throne for these two precious children. And as my sweet friend Heather always reminds me... even though it's so hard and the wait seems unbearable- we will continue to trust  Him while we wait. 







Now faith is confidence in what we hope for and assurance about what we do not see.   Hebrews 11:1

Trying to be patient... and an update on our patient!

Ok, so I apologize to those who were watching the blog yesterday waiting for an update! I updated FB and kind of forgot to let everyone else know what was going on. Sorry!

The news about court is that we *think* our case passed because I was able to talk with our friend Fekadu afterwards and he said that the family part is completed. This is an awesome thing and we were excited to hear that. BUT, he wasn't actually there in court,  so we don't know if the judge approved our family to be N and M's parents. We are so wanting to celebrate, but are very very cautious. Our agency was clueless and had not received an email from Ethiopia. Which means they really had no official news to tell me. Which makes me pretty nervous. Soooo once again we are sitting here WAITING. Waiting to hear if we passed court and can tell the world about our son and daughter, OR waiting to hear if the judge said no and therefore have to book tickets to leave for Ethiopia in A WEEK!

*I may or may not be a little anxious here. Oh my.

In other news, we got up bright and early (not that I really even slept!) yesterday morning to take Elliana in for her surgery. We literally picked her up our of bed and put her in the car half asleep. A few minutes later, this is how she looked- she was happy to be on a special trip with just mommy and daddy:

We got to the ENT surgery center and after filling out paperwork they called us back to Elliana's special bed. At first she was pretty happy and quite funny. She was chatting with the nurses and wanting to sing. We just told her the dr was going to take her to go night night in the other room and then we would see her soon. This is when she started getting a little nervous. They gave her toys and color crayons, but she mostly just wanted to be close to me and Randy.

 She got all dressed and ready to go, picked out bubble gum anesthesia to breathe in and then the nurse whisked her away.

We only waited about 20 minutes before the dr came out and told us the surgery was over- super fast! He said that her adenoids were huge and blocking her airways almost completely. He said she will be like a new kid when she's all healed up and can actually breathe! We had to wait a little longer before we could go in and see her, and when we did she had just started to wake up. Oh my- was she MAD! She screamed and thrashed and was just a mess for awhile, so Randy and I took turns holding her. She was in some pain, but mostly just out of sorts because of the anesthesia and she would yell at the nurse every time she came back in to check on her. She was not happy anymore!

After about an hour, we were on our way home. She was so relieved to get out of that place!

She was a screaming mess for a little while, but once we were home for a decent amount of time she was ready to go night night in her own bed. She slept for 3 hours! Amazingly, she woke up feeling so much better and downed two Jello cups in a matter of minutes! Um yeah- I think we are getting our girl back!

For the rest of the afternoon/evening she got progressively more happy and actually started getting crazy wild and hyper. I mean so wild that she was downright naughty- even grabbing a salad plate off the counter and throwing it on the floor to watch it shatter! It's like she's drunk on all the oxygen she's now getting! :)
I can only expect that she will continue to do well and once she's all healed up she might have even more energy- uh oh!


Thanks so much for praying for our sweet girl and for our continued adoption drama. It is so hard to be patient! I know that God is in control and He hears us when we cry out to Him. He will not forsake us! I hope to have good news today, but who knows?!



Those who know your name trust in you, 
   for you, LORD, have never forsaken those who seek you.  
Psalm 9:10

Tomorrow is the big day!!!

We are asking all of our family and friends to join us in praying today!There are two big things happening for our family Monday morning... 

The first is of course our court date in Ethiopia! While we are sleeping tonight (well, you will be sleeping- I probably won't be able to!) they will have family court in Ethiopia. We are asking for God to grant us favor with the judge and that she will accept our letter of exemption so that N and M can officially become our children. We are also praying for ALL of the necessary paperwork to be there too, as we have heard of many cases where 1 document was missing so they had to assign another court date. We are ready for this step to be completed and so please pray with us for God to do a miracle- that we would wake up tomorrow morning with the news that we passed court!!! My friend Erin has a court date this Thursday for their son who we met on our last trip and they are asking for the same miracle. Pray for them too!

The other news is that our little Elliana is having a small surgery tomorrow morning to have her adenoids removed. I  know that compared to most surgeries, this is so minimal. The whole procedure is like 20 minutes long. But, as her mama I still hate to see my baby put under anesthesia and in pain for any amount of time! She is too young to understand or even try to explain what is going to happen, so I have a feeling she might get a little freaked out when she goes in. Although no surgery is pleasant, I am actually looking forward to her having this and hoping that once she is recovered she will be feeling so much better! Poor girl has had so many problems that we didn't even know were related and she has been dealing with it all for quite some time now. The doctor says that once she is able to breathe, she will be so much happier and hopefully a lot less sick, no more drooling or gagging or snoring! Yes!

So if you are reading this, will you please say a prayer right now for our family? You are a part of our story and I want you to experience the blessing of seeing God answer prayers in crazy ways- cause that is what we are expecting Him to do! 

I will update tomorrow as soon as I am able, but it might be hard depending on how Elliana is doing. If we are friends on FB, you will most likely hear from me there first. :)

Have a great Sunday everyone!

Court Date in... 2 WEEKS!!!!!!!

Yep, you read that right- TODAY was our day to get some news!

We got the news today that a court date has been scheduled for November 28th... only 2 weeks from today!!! Praise the Lord- this is the best news we've received in awhile and the long awaited next step in our adoption process!!!

Ok, so before all the questions start, let me try to explain a little bit of our situation...

When we went back to Ethiopia in April, we went to not only spend time with N and M, but to ask them if they wanted to be a part of our family. That day was one of the best days of our lives, one we will never forget. I wrote about that very special Easter Sunday here.

When we left Ethiopia and had to experience the extremely painful reality of saying goodbye to the children for an unknown amount of time, we knew that there was no way we were going to be able to say goodbye AGAIN. This was the 2nd time we were leaving them and this time it was different than the first- this time we were their FAMILY. We had embraced N and M and squeezed them until the very last second we could and we looked them in the eyes and with tears promised them that we would be back. And that next time there would be no goodbyes. That next time it would be forever. And since that moment almost 7 months ago, they have been waiting and wondering when that next time is.

*Side note: {The way that the adoption process works for Ethiopia is much different than our process was for Korea. One of the big differences is that adoptive families are required to travel to Ethiopia twice in the adoption process. The first trip is for court and it is the trip that almost all families meet their children on. They have received a referral months before and it is on this trip that they are finally able to love in their little one and have a few days to interact with them before returning home. The 2nd trip is about 8 weeks later, after the U.S. embassy has issued a visa for the child and they are officially ready to travel home to be with their adoptive family.}

Ok, so since we are not the "typical" adoptive family we are in a slightly different situation. We have already met our children and spent a significant amount of time with them. We can prove through pictures and visas that we have been to Ethiopia twice already and are fully aware of any conditions that the children we hope to adopt might have. Because of this, we are asking to be exempt from appearing at our court date and hope to return to Ethiopia for the final embassy trip.

Obviously, this is not the norm and there is absolutely no guarantee that we will be granted permission to do this. But with the go-ahead from our agency, we are hopeful that on November 28th- the judge will approve our case AND accept our letter of exemption. The judge has been favorable in the past, but lately she has been much more strict about these cases so we just don't know what will happen.

And here is the real kicker- IF the judge does not accept our letter of exemption, we will have to find a way to BE IN ETHIOPIA for court on December 9th! Yikes! I really really don't want this to be the situation. For the obvious reasons of the pure cost to get there, leaving our kiddos at home, preparing, etc- but the worst part is thinking about going all the way there just to have to say goodbye AGAIN. I feel like the little bit of trust that N and M do have in us will be shattered. Not to mention I don't know if I physically can rip myself away from them for the third time. It is just too painful to think about.

So, instead of thinking about the worst case scenario, let's jump to the best-case scenario! :) I am a planner, so I would love for something like this to work out. Obviously, nothing in this process has worked out like we had planned, so we will just hope and pray and see what God does!

*November 28th- our case goes to court and is APPROVED by the judge and N and M are legally our children!
*6-10 weeks later, we get an embassy date (best case is 6 weeks. Worst case is many many months. but we won't go there)
*Travel back to Ethiopia the 3rd or 4th week of January for embassy appointment and
*Come HOME with two more beautiful children by the end of January!

Eeek! I can't even believe that I am daring to type this. That I'm daring to HOPE that we might be able to bring our children home in 10 weeks.... It is almost too much to hope for after all that we have been through.

Oh dear family and friends who are reading this: 
PLEASE PLEASE PRAY! Pray for favor with the judge on November 28th. (Actually, it will be the evening of the 27th our time) Pray that God would continue to do miracles as He has already done over and over. Pray that every piece of paper that is needed will be there and that we would PASS COURT in 2 weeks!


And most importantly, PRAISE God for all He has done already! It is truly amazing to look back and see that His hand has been in this from the very beginning and there is no way we would be here without Him! 


Thank you to my sweet friend Michelle who shared this scripture with me today that is so fitting.

"In his heart a man plans his course, but the Lord determines his steps."  Proverbs 16:9

Not today

For the past week, I have been a little more anxious each time the phone rings and a lot more impatient as I check my email repeatedly throughout the day. We have been expecting to hear news about our adoption for the past several weeks, specifically news about court. Last week I finally talked with our agency about our case and I was told that there have been more changes happening (oh really, what's new?!) and that there is a very real possibility that one change in particular will affect our case significantly.

As I got off the phone with the gal from our agency, I could feel the stress and emotions start to well up inside me.
Again.
I mean, c'mon- have we not been through enough already in the past year? Have we not felt enough pain and frustration and heartache yet? Have we not cried enough over the loss of more and more time with our 2 precious children?  Have they not spent enough time in an orphanage without a family to love them?

Apparently not.

Yes, I know that God is sovereign and that His timing is "perfect" but honestly each day that goes by and each hurdle we have to get over makes it just a bit harder to feel what we know to be the truth.

Our agency said that we should hear something either last week or for sure this week. (Which explains my obsession with needing to be checking email constantly.) And each day that comes and goes without any kind of news is hard.

We are praying once again for God to do a miracle in this situation. I am not going to go into detail yet about what exactly is going on, but just know that Randy and I can not find even ONE good thing about it if it happens. We have cried and prayed and wondered why we are in this process at the very time of so much change and uncertainty, but we just don't have an answer. All we know is that we love N and M fiercely and it is that love for them and the God who created them that keeps us fighting and praying that they would finally come home. And when that day comes... oh the rejoicing!!!

I know there are so many of you who have been praying and I can't even put into words how grateful we are for you. Keep praying. This story is not over yet and I know that He will be faithful to complete what He has begun. It is not our story at all. It's God's. And I have a feeling that it's just about to get to the good part! :)

So, in case you were about to ask me the million dollar question: "Any news yet?" My answer is sadly no.



Not today.

But there's always tomorrow....

We have some good news!

and Elliana is excited about it! She is always excited when we have news about her brother and sissy!


Well, this blog has officially been neglected for long enough! I plan to be back to posting once or twice a week again. Just in time to share some REALLY GOOD NEWS!


Last Friday we received our official referral for N and M! FINALLY!!! Whoo hooo!!!

After so many months of waiting and agonizing over when or even IF this adoption was going to be able to happen, and although we have been walking by faith through these past almost 11 months, the referral was the step we have been waiting for to be able to continue on this journey.

Friday, August 12 was just like any other day. That morning I emailed our agency's director asking if she had heard anything from Ethiopia about our referral. It had now been almost 6 weeks since that day we heard that the kids were approved and we knew that they had gone in for their medical exams already, so we were wondering what was taking so long! This was the 2nd or 3rd time in the past few months that I had emailed her and this agency is not the best at communicating, so I really didn't expect much of a response- especially not the same day.

Imagine my surprise when 30 minutes later I got a response! The email said that they had all of the info on the kids and the last thing that needed to be done was that the social worker needed to have the talk with us about being prepared for adopting older kids and once she signed off then we were good to go. She told us that our file was on her desk and the social worker would call us eventually but if we wanted to move along a little faster then we could go ahead and give her a call.

So of course I sat ever so patiently and waited for the social worker to call.

OR NOT!!!

You know me well enough by now to know that I couldn't do that!

A whole 5 minutes might have passed before I was on the phone dialing and hoping that she would be in the office. I hadn't even called Randy yet. I know- what a great wife I am. Again. But in defense, we have been on this journey for so long already that I knew he would want me to find out the news asap- even if he couldn't be there.

So I talked with the social worker and refreshed her memory that we had indeed already talked many months ago about how incredibly difficult it can be adopting children so much older as well as out of birth order. I assured her that we know about the many things that can happen and that we are not going into this blindly. We do have resources that we can go to for help and we are taking some precautions, but when it comes down to it we have no idea what issues N and M will be dealing with except that they have had a lot of pain and grief in their young lives. The bottom line is that we LOVE them and we are COMMITTED to being their parents and so we will cross each bridge as we come to it.

Is it scary? Yes! Will there be things we are totally unprepared for? Of course!

We know that there is a reason that the VAST MAJORITY of people who adopt don't even consider a child over 4 or 5 years old, let alone teenagers. With the Lord's help, we hope to change the stigma about adopting "older children" and we pray that God will move in the hearts of others who are watching and wondering if God might be calling them to love on children whom everyone else has given up on- whether it is children in foster care in our own city or around the world. Oh there is a lot more I could say on this topic alone, but I'll save that for another post down the road!

Back to the story!

After I talked with this gal, she said that was it and we were good to go and was about ready to hang up. I was like wait a minute- what about the referral? Is someone supposed to call? She said that another gal in the office takes care of that and she thought we had already been called! Uh no. So she asks the other lady if she has time to get it to me and then she tells me that once we get off the phone they would get it ready to send.

So as fast as I got on the phone- I was back off again! :)

It took a few hours, but the email finally came and we got the "official referral" for our kids.

It was actually pretty anti-climactic to be honest.

The pictures were not too special, especially after having so many good ones from our trip in April. I actually looked at them both and started crying. He looks kind of sad and she is smiling, but looks so much more grown up than when we last saw her. If any of you have watched your child grow up through pictures, you know exactly what I mean. I just wanted to reach into the pictures and hug them and love on them. There was not a whole lot of information in the file that we didn't know, but the one thing that we were really hoping for was not there.

We had been told by the director when he thought their birthdays were and so we have been going with that but we were waiting so see the dates made official on the paperwork.
Well, they have M's birthday as a month later than we thought, which is not a huge deal, but they didn't even have a date for N! I know that they have their birth-certificates in Ethiopia because that is one of the things we were waiting on, but somehow they failed to put that information there. So his age is still a bit of a mystery to us, but it doesn't matter that much because we still love them no matter how old they are!

Later this weekend I got an email from the orphanage director with a few pictures of them with their packages we sent about a month ago. It was good to know that they received the few little things we sent and that they have our letters to hold onto and read as they continue to wait. Have I told you how much we miss them? sigh.

We are praising the Lord for this good news of our referral! Even though we are still facing many more months of waiting (the courts just closed for two months on top of everything else- nice.) we are thrilled to be at this point. We had so many months of being unsure if we would ever get to this point, and now that we are here, it's like we can breathe a little sigh of relief. It will happen. Now it's just a matter of waiting on God's timing- again! We are praying and hoping that we would be able to celebrate this Christmas with ALL 6 of our children, but we must trust that God is in control.

Thank you for your prayers for us and for our kids. Join with us in praising God today for His goodness and faithfulness!

Praise the LORD! We've got good news!

All day yesterday I could not get Ephesians 3:20-21 out of my mind.

We are praising God for doing IMMEASURABLY MORE than all we could ask or imagine.
Want to know why? :)

Read on!

As you know from this post about a month ago, we have been waiting and praying that the Lord would do the impossible. It has been a very long few months since we said goodbye to our N and M in Ethiopia and there have been many days of discouragement and heart ache since then. But all along we have been praying and praying and knowing that we have a God that loves us and answers us in His timing and according to His will.

And while there are many things that we have been praying for, I would say the biggest is that the children would be able to be moved so that the adoption process in Ethiopia could finally get started. If you are confused as to why that needed to happen click HERE. One of the obstacles we were faced with during the last several months was that the closest living relative needed to submit documents to 3 levels of governments before the children could be moved to an orphanage that was licensed for adoption . There was a point in the process that we were told it was going to be next to impossible to get the government approvals with all of the changes and restrictions that are happening right now. We were not getting much encouraging news. Actually none. So we did the only thing we could do.

Wait and pray.

Pray and wait.

And trust that He who has called us IS faithful.

And yesterday He answered those prayers.

Big time. :)


We got news yesterday that all 3 levels are approved and the government has already assigned their files to a licensed orphanage! This is what we have been praying for!

But that's not the best part...

Oh how He LOVES us and LOVES to knock us down with His goodness to us!

We were told that because this particular orphanage is one that our agency already works with...

N and M do NOT have to be moved!

Did you hear that??? They GET TO STAY where they are at! They get to be with their friends and caregivers that they have been living with for the past 4+ years while the paperwork for the adoption is processed!

This is SO much more than all we could ask or imagine! We had been simply praying that they would be moved and our God just moved the mountains!

And get this: after we cried tears of JOY and praised the Lord for what He had done already, I went out a little later to check the mail.

And of all the days, the Lord chose this already amazing day to bless us AGAIN.

After 119 DAYS of waiting... we got our immigration approval!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Seriously Lord??!!! I just kept thinking of Ephesians 3:30-21 over and over again:



Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen.



All of a sudden we went from months of nothing to 3 huge things happening all in the same day!!!

It is still not going to happen overnight, and a whole lot of other things still need to take place, but right now things are looking a lot more hopeful! We feel like there is still the possibility of bringing our children home this fall and we are now praying hard for that. It has been too long already!

Thank you to those who have been faithful in praying for our family and especially N and M. To those who have sent emails and messages and calls of encouragement and support and who have believed with us that God can and will make all things possible... it means more to me than you may ever know.
You have blessed this waiting-mama's heart and I am so grateful.

Can't wait to see what He does next!

Longing

Yes- I, like you am tired of looking at this blog and seeing the word impossible at the very top.


I am ready for God to do the impossible so I can have some big news to share. It's coming soon- I just know it. He is in control. 


I know, there are so many other things I could blog about other than the adoption: 
Random events, Elliana updates, summer fun, some of the crazy things God is teaching me and doing in my heart, our last day in Ethiopia (which has been too hard to think about), and of course pictures to document it all.


Summer has officially begun and we are enjoying the time just being together. We have made our lists and have our calendar filled with fun family activities that we all enjoy doing. It really has been great and the kids are having a blast. 


But there is always a part of me that is just never fully here. It's still in Africa. It's the part of me that was left behind with two beautiful children whom I am begging God to let be a part of our family. Yes, of course we love our kids here and are enjoying the summer with them- but there is still a longing that just does not go away. It is a mama's heart that knows when something's not right. And the something that's not right is that we are separated from our children. For how long is only something God knows. And until the day when we are finally together again, I know that the longing and missing them will not go away. Because it is a gift from the Lord. It is a gift that He is giving us during this long, hard journey. Each day that goes by without them, each time that we go somewhere and feel that something or someone(s) is missing, each day that we cry out to the Lord in our sadness, makes for the reunion all that much more sweet. 


We hear that they are asking about us every day. Asking what the updates are. Asking when it is time and asking WHEN their mom and dad are coming back for them. You see, this time the longing is not just us. This time there are a 10 and 12 year old sister and brother who are longing for a family. And not just any family. WE are their family and they are longing for US. We pray that they would not give up hope, but like us they would cry out to the Lord in their longing and that He would fulfill their desire for a family in His perfect timing.

Even Elliana has been so sweet. She talks about "N" and "Sissy" ALL the time. She carries their picture around and asks "Sissy bye bye?" several times a day. The other day I was talking on the phone and I mentioned N and the next thing I knew Elliana was trying to grab the phone from me- asking if she could talk to him on the phone. She thought I was actually talking to our N right then and she was ready to talk with her brother! She wants to know what's taking them so long! :) 

Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but a longing fulfilled is a tree of life. Proverbs 13:12


Today we are heading to the beach for a little weekend get-away. I am excited for a chance to have a few days to get away from the heat, the computer, and just all the stuff that needs to be done. We plan to chill by the water, take bike rides on the beautiful trails, walk along the beach, and sit around just doing nothing. We will go from 104 degree weather in Fresno to 68 degrees in Pismo- perfect. Almost. :)
I know we will enjoy being together as a family, but of course I also know that there will still be that part of me that longs for the day when we will have all 6 of our children playing together in the sand and water. Or even just the day when they will all be together.




Someday.